Florida

I am so sorry to have let this go so long without a post. I did not realize it has been over 2 months. I guess just in the excitement of having my husband back I forgot to keep this updated. We have had fun just being together again and going on dates.
Florida is wonderful. Absolutely beautiful country here. I love it and would not mind to stay forever here. There is water everywhere. Trees everywhere. The beaches are incredible. We went on day and the sand is white and surprisingly not hot, it was cold. The water is the most beautiful body of water I have ever seen in person...I used to think water like this was only possible after retouching a picture. But I can not attest to the beauty here. The most amazing part about Florida is the almost constant rainstorms. Ok so they are not constant but usually it will rain about every other day and being from AZ that is quite a feat and I am loving it.
This summer is probably one of the most bitter sweet ones of my life. It is amazing to be here in Florida and to be with Chase again, however, the countdown has started for returning to school, away from him. But I try not to dwell on the sad, otherwise I will miss out of so many other things I can do with my life.
We love you and hope you have a great day! Enjoy your summer and never take the ones you love for granted, you never know when your precious time with them will be up! Our love always -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Home, Sweet Home

So for the last four days I have been in Arizona with my family and it has been so fun. I feel so at home here, it almost feels like I never left home. It is fun to be in an environment where everyone loves you and knows you.
Even at church yesterday, it was so fun to see the people that I have not seen for several years. I loved saying hi and hearing how life was going for them.
While here, I have just been hanging out with my mom and enjoying the relaxation of no real responsibilities or deadlines. I am working on projects that I have been wanting to do for over a year, so it is so nice to finish all things that I want to do.
As far as the rest of the summer plans, I am just hanging out in AZ with my family until Chase is moved to Florida and I can officially live with him again, which will hopefully be by the end of the month.
We will keep you updated! Love you all -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Deeper Understanding of Trials

So I was going through my files today, deciding which ones to keep and which ones to delete. As I was doing this, I came across this story that I got form my Grandma Tew. I guess I decided to post it because I know in life many of us can feel like we are about to break at different times of our lives as we are faced with different trials. However, we just need to remember that it is for our profit and learning and the Lord only ever has our best interest at heart. These last few months I have reaffirmed to me that maybe what I need to do is pray for added strength to face my trials and afflictions as opposed to praying for them to end. Anyway, here is the story.

Malachi 3:3 says: “He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver.” This verse puzzled some women in a bible study and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God. One of the women offered to find out the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible Study.
That week, the women called a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn’t mention anything about the reason for her interest beyond her curiosity about the process of refining silver.
As she watched the silversmith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities. The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot; then she thought again about the verse that says: “He sits as a refiner and purifier of silver.”
She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time. The man answered that yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed.
The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silversmith, “How do you know when the silver is fully refined?” He smiled at her and answered, “Oh, that’s easy – when I see my image in it.”

If today you are feeling the heat of the fire, remember that God has his eye on you and will keep watching you until He sees His image in you. God will always be there for us, just pray to him and He will give you the strength you need.
We love you all and hope you have a fabulous weekend -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Visiting Chase

So I know it has been a while, however, life has been busy. I know I always say that and it probably gets old, but finals were here while I was packing and moving, while trying to decided what stuff would stay in Utah and what stuff we would be taking for the time we will be living together this summer. So life has been crazy.
Additionally, last minute, me and Chase decided that I would go and visit him immediately following my last final, which is tomorrow, and I should probably be studying for it or sleeping, but I am obviously doing neither.
So I will finish my final and go straight to the airport and then fly out to see Chase for a week, fly back into SLC and then head off to AZ to spend time with my parents until I can move to Florida with Chase.
As least those are the plans for now, but with the military things are ever changing. We love you all and are grateful for your support, love and prayers. We pray for you in return and hope for the best for you! We love you all -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Latest Update from the Army

So to give a little background so that everyone understands what is happening. Chase is currently in Alabama finishing the first 10 weeks of his advanced training. After those 10 weeks, he will be heading down to Florida to finish the last 30 weeks of his training. While he is in Alabama, I am not allowed to be there with him, but once he gets to Florida that is when I am allowed to join him again.
Last Monday, I got a call from Chase telling me that I would not be able to move out there until as late as August due to an over-booking of classes in Florida. This news was devastating to me because it has already been almost 2 months since I have seen him last. So I talked to my parents and we decided that I would stay with my parents because I do not have school or work to keep me in Utah this summer.
But then Tuesday, we found out that it was mainly a housing issue and since the married guys don't live in the barracks, we would still be able to go sooner, because they were giving married soldiers the priority, but they were not able to give us a time frame at that time. So that lifted my spirits slightly, but still sad that I would not get to see him as soon.
Thursday, I believe, but it may have been Wednesday, Chase found out that they were holding back all the female soldiers in Alabama and convert the female housing into male housing for the time being in Florida. So theoretically, Chase should be in Florida by the same time he originally was going to be in Florida. But since there is still some uncertainty, I am not allowed to go out there until after Chase is already out there and makes all the arrangements for me to follow.
So we are hoping to be together by the end of May, but there is still no guarantees, but that is our hope.
Chase graduates April 23 from his classes in Alabama and he has been told that he will be in Florida within 7 days of that, so by the 30th of April. Then we are hoping that within 2 weeks all the arrangements for me to move out there will be ready and he will get leave to fly out here and help me move the stuff out there for the summer. So that is the plan. Hopefully that will be the way it all pans out, but we are not sure and only time will tell, but we will keep you updated.
Love you all and thanks for reading! -- Chase 'n Ashlee

It's Fixed

The comments should be working now. I think you should be able to leave comments now, if not please let me know again so I can fix it! Love ya -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Comments

Within the last week it has come to my attention that people are unable to leave comments. I am not exactly sure why this is, but I fiddled around with the different settings and think I may have fixed that problem...if you would like to try, please feel free.
Also, through some emails that I received, I would like to clarify my position in my last blog. First, let me say that I hope I did not offend anyone with that post, that was not my intention. Also, I hope that no one thought I was judging people in that situation, because I understand why people feel that way, I was just trying to get out into words how I was feeling with the situation that I had witnessed.
The situation made me a little sad, it is true. However, I was not trying to criticize anyone or make anyone feel bad about having said those kinds of things or having felt that way before.
I apologize for not being able to adequately expressed my thoughts and feelings in such a way to help people understand what is truly being thought and said. I have never had a gift for languages or words, written or spoken. So I ask for your forgiveness and will try harder in the future to be more clear with those things that I am sharing.
Thanks for following and sharing your life with mine. I love you and hope that life is good for you! -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Do They Even Know What They Have?

I overheard a conversation today of this girl talking to her dad. She is married and in my semester of nursing school. She just found out that she is pregnant, due in November and will not graduate for about a year after that. She was crying and telling her dad that she cannot do this and she can not do both. She even said she did not want this right now.
My heart sank when I heard this. Over the last year or year and a half, I have had several friends that have felt like they have been in a similar situation where they did not feel ready to have children, did not want a child yet or flat out never wanted children.
Whenever I hear someone express these kinds of ideas and feelings, it breaks my heart. I always get super sad and have to fight back the tears so that they will not see me like that and so they will not feel bad. However, it always makes me sad because since I have been married, I have really wanted to have a baby. There are very few things that I desire more than to be a mother and many times I feel like I would be willing to give anything to have a baby right now.
When we were dating and engaged, Chase and I talked about what we wanted to do on this subject. We decided that we were not going to do anything to prevent pregnancy but not necessarily going to try to have a child.
It has been official for almost 6 months, but we are a clinically infertile couple. It breaks my heart to feel like this is something that I have to struggle with in this life. I have always had the desire to be a mother in Zion.
I cannot even express how many gallons of tears I have cried over this issue and every time I think I may be pregnant, when I realize I am not, the pain is almost unbearable.
Do these girls who cry about being pregnant even realize what they have? Do they realize what a gift it is to bring such a wonderful, special spirit into this world?
Why do so many take this privilege and blessing for granted? Do they realize how many people do not get to experience this? Do they even think about the feelings of those people who may never experience that wonderful life giving power?
I hope to someday be able to feel the joy and excitement of being able to know that I will be able to give a body to one of our Heavenly Father's spirit children. Someday I hope to be able to know what it feels like to have my husband rub my stomach and talk to our little one. Someday, I hope to know what it feels like to have my little one doing somersaults in my stomach. I want to be able to hold my little one, right after giving birth, and wonder if this is how Mary felt while she held her little boy. Or is this how my mother felt while she held me for the very first time.
I wish someday I will have that privilege and opportunity to experience the life giving power that so many of my peers seem to be devastated by. It amazes me that what destroys one woman's dreams is the exact same thing that will complete my deepest dream and desire.

School and Study Buddies

This semester school has been tough and busy. There have been several times I felt like I have barely been holding on. However, over the last week, I have got this new surge of energy and motivation for school.
I am not sure where it came from, but I am grateful for it. I am very grateful for my two dearest friends from the nursing program with me because I am sure they have something to do with it. These two girls are twins and very devoted students. As I have spend more and more time with them over the last few weeks, I have become progressively more motivated and less overwhelmed.
I think their superior study habits are staring to rub off on me and in the last two days we have taken two exams and the lowest grade on them was 88%. Not bad.
I testify to the benefits of having study partners. It is wonderful and amazing. I have enjoyed hanging out with these girls and getting to know more about them. I am grateful for them in my life and all that they have done for me this semester and know that we will be life-long friends.
Thanks for all your support and love. I know that there are many prayers being said in mine and Chase's behalf, thank you. I know that those too are great contributing factor in my success this semester. Love you all so very much! -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Sacrament Meeting Talk

So I have been asked to give a talk in Sacrament meeting on April 11th. It is based off a talk from the last general conference, entitled "Preserving the Heart's might change." It is a great talk that I highly recommend reading again, when you get the chance.
If anyone has any suggestions for that talk it would be great. Thanks for everything. Love you lots and hope life is treating you well. -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Our Life

Chase is still on fast-track to leave Redstone Arsenal early and get to Eglin Air Force Base early, which means he will probably graduate early from his Advanced Training. We will keep everyone updated on when the graduation will be. But plan on sometime in December, which I know is the worse time for that to happen since it is already a very busy time of year.
Chase will start his classes, hopefully, tomorrow. Once he is done with that class, he will have only two more things before being able to be moved to Eglin AFB in Florida. He is excited at the prospect of finishing early, but we will see what happens, there is no guarantee that he will be able to get to Eglin early. So only time will tell, and I will keep you updated.
As far as life with me in Utah, I am just chugging along in school. Finishing this semester. I am trying really hard not to lose motivation for school, which is really hard when you heart is divided between school and husband and you know that you can not have both at the same time.
This semester I will be finishing my medical/surgical rotation at the hospital. So far I have been on the cardiac floor, the post-surgical floor and spent the last two weeks in the OR. It has been really fun and I have really enjoyed my time in the hospital.
I am so excited by the prospect of seeing Chase in a little under two months. It will be such a treat to have a break from school for a few months and get to be with him. I think it will be what I need to regain my motivation to start doing it all over again. We love you all and are so grateful for your prayers that have helped us get through this experience. We could not be doing it if those prayers were not being said. Thank you so very much, and hope that someday you will understand how much it has helped us through. -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Update on Chase

So I was talking to Chase last night and he told me some great news. Due to his high ASVAB (Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery) score, his time in Alabama could possibly be shortened by about 8 weeks. We are unsure if this means that he will be done with training that much sooner or if he will just be in Florida for that much more time. Chase did not even think about it. So when I asked him, he told me he would have to ask today and he will let me know.
The only two things that would make it so this would not happen is: 1. If Chase does not pass his army physical training (PT) test, which he passed with flying colors on his last one, so I am not too worried about that, but if you all would be willing to pray with us that he will be able to do well, his PT test will be on Thursday. 2. He will be having a dental check in the next few days and if he does not need any work done. I am pretty confident he will not need any work done, but we will see.
So I will keep you updated as I learn more about this possibility and about any new developments in our lives. Love you all and thank you for your support. -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Good News

So great news...Chase gets to keep his phone with him during Advanced Individual Training (AIT). This is great because it basically means he can call me whenever he has free time, which I know will probably change a little once his training actually starts, but I am way excited to be able to talk to him. But once again, this is a privilege that can be taken away, and if it is taken away from one, it is taken away from all. So hopefully no one will mess it up for the group. I think that is the thing I dislike the most about military, is that I get punished for another persons mistakes. I said that to Chase and he smiled and reminded me that we volunteered for this lifestyle, but it still stinks. Anyway, thought I would share that good news.
And he has already talked to me today...these next few weeks are going to be way better than the last 7 weeks.
Love you all! -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Basic Training Graduation

So I am sitting in the Airport waiting to fly back to Utah from South Carolina. What an amazing trip. It was really neat watching the graduation ceremony. Watching as about 1500 soldiers marched together and recited the Soldier's Creed in unison.
As Chase marched past me, my heart skipped a beat and I knew that this is our life now. I am not sure if it will be 4 years, 10 years or career, but I know that he will enjoy every moment of it. This life style just fits him. It fits us!
It still seems so surreal in many ways that I actually got to see him. It was bitter-sweet. It was fun to see him but it almost seems like a huge tease because I could not see him for more than about 20 hours (10 hours each day).
Plus to make it worse, I found out this weekend, that anytime he is in uniform and in public, there is no Public Displays of Affection (PDA). PDA includes hugs longer than 3 seconds, holding hands, arms around waist or shoulder...basically no touching of any kind that could be construed as affectionate. It was hard, I kept forgetting and trying to hold his hand as we walked, and he would kindly remind me. But it was sad, because I had not seen him for just under 7 weeks and I could not hold his hand or anything until we returned to our car, since that is not considered a public area.
On a happy note, there are two fellow soldiers that were in Chases company, who also went to church with Chase every Sunday and these soldiers feel pretty close and I got to meet the wives this weekend and it was nice to spend time with them and get to know them. We switched numbers and so we can stay in contact and I really think that they will be life long friends. It was fun to feel like there are other people who are experiencing the same thing that I am and we can help each other get through these hard times. When we got back to the hotel, cause we shared a hotel for the weekend, we would laugh about all the funny stories that our husbands would talk about and we complained together about the fact that holding hands in considered PDA and other funny things. It was really fun to meet these women and know that not only can we support each other in these military experiences but we can support each other in the gospel. What a tender mercy of the Lord to have found such wonderful support and friends.
Thank you for you support in us and the love that you show us. I am so very grateful for all that we have and I know that we are so blessed by our friends and family prayers that are said in our behalf. Thank you so much!
Chase does not know his new address yet, but as soon as I find out what it is, I will let you all know. Thanks and hope you have a wonderful day! Keep a smile on your face...life is beautiful! -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Get to see him

I am waiting for my ride, and so I decided to get on really quick and let everyone know that I am about to see Chase. It still seems so surreal. I am way excited but it does not seem real yet.
It has been almost 7 weeks since I have last seem him and I can not wait to get a hug from him and hear him tell me, in person, that he loves me. I can not wait to have him hold me in is arm and he in mine. I can not wait to give him my Valentine's present and try express to him in words how much he means to me in my life.
Life is wonderful. The Lord is my friend and support during these times. I know I am only able to do all I do because of Him. Keep the faith! Smile for the world to see. Never let the world tell you that you are less that amazing and beautiful. Love you all and hope you have a wonderful weekend! -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Valentine's Day

Today is Valentine's Day and the Love of my life is thousands of miles away. I pondered many hours over what I could get him for Valentine's Day, since he has limited space to keep things and I did not want it to be a frivolous gift. I wanted it to mean something to both of us, but especially him.

As I pondered about this predicament, I decided I would write him a poem, expressing my love for him. I have decided to share this poem with you and I am sorry I am not the best writer and don't follow all the literary rules, but I think it is message and sentiment that is the most important. I hope you enjoy.

All I look for, All I seek

Upon reflection of my life

The laughs, the love, the tears, the strife

It's hard to see how I could find

Happiness, fulfillment, peace of mind

Independence that was me

But now my future I can see

Without it my life would be so bleak

All I look for, All I seek

Will forever and eternally be you

No one else could ever do

For my life I had a plan

From my life, all men I did ban

A mission for my Lord was in line

This dream had always been one of mine

Onto the scene a young man came

Instantly, I thought him quite lame

Self-absorbed, shollow -- rather low

My first impressions of this beau

First date -- breakfast -- a total blast

He then tried to push me too fast

I backed off, still saw him around

A new best friend in him I had found

Independence that was me

But now my future I can see

Without it my life would be so bleak

All I look for, All I seek

Will forever and eternally be you

No one else could ever do

Tried to win my love with all his might

My will, My power, his love did I fight

More than friends he wanted to be

Best friend is all he was to me

Learning about him and he about me

The deeper him I got to see

Breaking down the walls of hurt

Scared -- running -- I began to avert

As I ran the Lord stepped in

Telling me not to run -- It is him

From that point I knew what to do

All I wanted was to be with you

Independence that was me

But now my future I can see

Without it my life would be so bleak

All I look for, All I seek

Will forever and eternally be you

No one else could ever do

Now my husband, I'm his wife

I could not imagine more from life

I am so loved, I am so blessed

All from heeding the Lord's behest

Thank you for your patience in me

I came around once I could see

What more from life could there be

Together -- in love -- for eternity

My one and only, The love of my life

Together we will conquer all strife

With you by my side, I can do all things

I cannot wait to see what life brings

Independence that was me

But now my future I can see

Without it my life would be so bleak

All I look for, All I seek

Will forever and eternally be you

'Cause no one else could ever do

-- Ashlee Manwaring

Anyway, that is my poem. I hope you enjoyed it and wish you all a wonderful Valentine's Day. Cherish your loved ones and tell them you love them because you never know when they will no longer be there to tell. If you are single, be grateful. Enjoy life! Being single is great and if you make the most of it, you will be that much more ready for love when the Lord puts it in your lap. I love you all and hope life is treating you well. Happy Valentine's Day! -- Chase 'n Ashlee

Family Blog

So I know that there have been several people who have asked me to start keeping my blog updated. So I am going to try to start doing so, but I decided that if I were going to start blogging again, I would want to create one for the family and not just myself. Plus it is always nice to feel like you get a new start, a clean slate. I do want to let everyone know that I make no promises to how often I will be able to get on here to update everyone, but I will do my best.

I will eventually go back and update you on the past year or so, but right now I will let you know what is happening with us right now.

Chase -- he is just finishing up Basic Training. He will be graduating on Friday. So I am flying out to go see him. I leave Wednesday morning, Thursday is Family Day and Friday is graduation. After graduation, Chase gets to leave base and sight see the near by town. So I will essentially get to spend the two days with him and then I fly back Saturday afternoon.

Ashlee -- I have been good, just busy. I am currently in my Med/Surg semester of Nursing School at BYU. I am loving my classes and all the I am learning and doing. I am finally starting to feel like the end is in sight, after this semester I will be half way through nursing school. I am also working on campus as a TA. I am working with one of the most wonderful men in the world, Dr. Woolley. He is such a neat person, and I love getting to work with him and learn so much from him. I took is pathophysiology class last year and then was his TA after that. He teaches 3 classes and I work with all of them. It is such a fun job and it helps to fill the time with Chase gone.

That is pretty much what we are up to right now. Life is pretty much the same old, same old. Nothing really new or exciting for the most part. Our family goal is to live life the way that Heavenly Father would want us to and in such a way that he can be proud of us. And I can tell you that I am only able to do all I do because of his daily help. He is such a wonderful Father. I am so grateful for my testimony of Him and His love for me...and each of you! I hope you have a wonderful day and remember to keep the Lord close. Love you all! -- Chase 'n Ashlee